Quite bluntly, I hate, hate NephritexJadeite. Most of it seems to tend toward the hurtfully OOC, "Well because there's two of them and they ummm... they should get together." So it was in a bout of "Okay, fine, what if they DID get together.", aka pure evil that I began this fic.

I forgot it for a while, until I ended up in a conversation or two about the worst couples ever. "If somebody else can think up something that demented," thought I, "I bet I can finish this silly little vignette." So I did.

"Sayounara My Only Love"

He stood rumpled and bleary-eyed at the large picture-window. The view was little more than dim outlines of trees in the thick mist; but he wasn't seeing it, anyway. He was, instead, pondering ways of avoiding that which was worse than death. So far, he hadn't thought of anything.

Being able to think straight would have helped.

Behind him, the faint, lighthearted sounds of a wineglass being tapped on a fine wood table seemed determined to drive Jadeite to violence.

He whipped around; and the table's occupant only regarded him lazily.

"If you're going to leave your clothes on," Nephrite drawled, "I'm not sure what you've come here for. You've been too long amongst those humans of yours if you expect my loving support."

He paused to take a long drink. Jadeite fumed.

"You've fucked up, Jadeite."

" ... " it was quite true. He seethed. The assignment had seemed a wonderful way to a promotion, but somehow everything had gone wrong. Damn brats. Damn Beryl. Damn fate. The whole world seemed to have taken up arms against him. And all-- Nephrite-- would do-- was sit there. "I thought you owed me." he said testily.

"As I hear," Nephrite replied lazily, eyes fixed on the glass before him, "Beryl owes you favors too. And I don't see that making any difference."

Jadeite turned back towards the window abruptly, red-faced.

"Come now," his fellow said, almost gently, "You can't expect to try and sleep your way up and have it kept secret. Really, you didn't organize this thing very well, did you?"

"Oh, shut up." the blond man was seething, wishing it wasn't so easy for Nephrite to make him feel foolish. Wishing for Great Metallia's sake that he hadn't been so foolish. And then, with venom: "I hate you." He hated himself as soon as he'd said it. It sounded bratty and childish.

Nephrite chuckled, the nasty edge returning. "Can't say the same, I'm afraid. You've never been impressive enough to hate," Jadeite spun furiously around again, but the other man remained unaffected. "It's all your own fault. From sloppy planning to associating with that youma to supposing you were anything but transparent to me."

After a brief pause, Nephrite stood and advanced upon his bedraggled comrade.

"But you're still pretty," he whispered huskily, sliding an arm around Jadeite's waist, "One last one for old time's sake?"

There was a simultaneous stinging blow across his face and flash of energy. Nephrite was left standing alone, a faint bruise on his cheek. He shook his head and smiled.